I’ve been home for over a week now, but it still feels a little strange. Sure, this is “home” – the place I where I grew up, where I made my first friends, where I had my first kiss and where I read my first books. A place of great firsts and bad lasts. But it’s also a place of disconnect.
Right now I feel stuck in between. I am looking for a new job, a new place to live and new routines. I am a little bored, to tell you the truth. I miss my friends in Oregon. I miss the sporadic lunches, impromtu wine dates, impulsive shopping trips and the sound of the doorbell.
A lot has changed over the past few years (naturally). I’ve changed, and I am not talking about the added 20 pounds. My hair is shorter, I am a little bit wiser but mostly I am more aware of myself and my identity. I’m a thousand faces richer, a thousand places more experienced. I’ve learned a lot and failed a lot. I may not yet know what I want, but I definitely know what I don’t want. I don’t want to work at a factory, I don’t want kids, I don’t want to be just like everyone elsem, and I certainly don’t want to settle down…yet.
There is still so much to discover. There are still so many things that I want to do.
I’m changed, but I am still me. I feel the contrasts are bigger this time around.
What a strange place to be…. in between transistions. My own personal limbo.
I don’t know where I belong – neither here, nor there.
I don’t have a job or my own place. I don’t even know what I will be doing one year from today.
But it’s not about what I lack. It’s about what I’ve gained. My husband and I are now on the threshold of our future.
We did it! We took the leap. We found the courage to break loose and dive into unknown and foreign territory.
For me, it’s back to my home country, my old life, and the place I once wanted so desperately to leave. For my husband, it’s an exciting and unexplored territory – a wrapped present ready to be unveiled.
But we’re in this together as a team. We can do this.
What lies ahead? We don’t know. But what we do know is that we’ll make the most of it in the bravest way we can.
Excuse the somewhat vain title of this post, but I am in serious need of some advice. My nails are failing me! I’m at wit‘s end about what to do. No matter how hard I try, I cannot for the life of me grow them longer than a millimeter. They break at the plain sight of a soda can. It‘s like they whisper faintly, *don’t you dare challenge us to open that.*
I’ve tried cuticles cream, growth treatment, nail polish for strength – you name it. My nails are just as frail and flimsy as an oak leaf in the wind. Pardon the cliche.
So what‘s a girl to do?
Any advice out there?