Category Archives: stupid

The paperwork NEVER ends

Oh, the irony. I can’t remember if I’ve written this before or not, my blogging these days is anything but punctual. However, to make a long story short – the day after I set my wobbly feet back on US soil I got a letter from our attorney. Jamie had been granted his Norwegian visa. Earth, please: shake, crack and spit me, for I can take no more. Let me remind you, we struggled for two freaking years to get that decision. We thought all hope was lost, not literally, but for the time being, and we needed a change. So I quit my job, sold our furniture, moved the rest of our belongings back to mom and dad, and decided to head west once again. Tada! And then, THEN, on the other side of the world, sans jobs and a crib, Norway decided they wanted us after all. Well, tough shit.

We’ll go back one day, of course. But right now, we’re back to scratch, filling out the paperwork for the alien (that would be me). And some of the questions I need to answer YES or No to, sound like these,

“Do you intend to engage in the United States in espionage?”

“Have you ever ordered, incited, called for, committed, assisted, helped with, or otherwise participated in …. acts involving torture or genocide?”

Why, yes. Is that going to be a problem? Kidding.

Jokes aside, I’m looking forward to the day Jamie and I can live “normally” (what’s normal, anyways?) without having to file applications and applications in order to live like a married couple on the same continent without some bizarre deadline looming.

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21: Teen blogging gone too far?

It’s with horror I register the growing number of “tween blogs” that consist of make-up, fashion and teenage pregnancy. I can partly see the need for young people to express themselves, but what I find repulsive is the business that make money by exploiting young, naive girls who suddenly find themselves on the rise to online fame based on a rating system relying on their looks and popularity. It’s a phenomenon I wasn’t quite aware of until I moved back to Norway. If you look at the blog platform, blogg.no, there is a “top list” that bloggers apparently strive to be on. What’s interesting is that the majority of these blogs don’t contain timely commenting on news articles, society or culture, but instead a creepy obsession with achieving a certain “look”. The tanner, taller, thinner, prettier and richer you are, the more readers you’ll gain and the more attention you’ll get from companies that will shower you in products and money if you write about or pose with their product on your blog; – be it make-up, teeth whitening, hair extensions and whatnot. Most of these bloggers aren’t yet 18, so why on earth are their parents allowing them to get their lips pumped full of restylane, getting boob jobs or letting them post pictures of themselves in sexy poses?

Take a look at one of the current teen-queen bloggers, Sophie Elise, whose parents apparently have given her the permission to undergo a seemingly extreme makeover…

 

I mean, geesh, what is the world (wide web) coming to?

What I’m up to

Yeah, not much blogging going on lately. Don’t give up on me yet. I will be back.

In the meantime I am fighting a war against my own government. Yup, you read it right. I officially hate my own country. As much as I sometimes dislike the people here, the arrogant attitudes, the high prices, ridiculous alcohol laws, fucked up roads and bland food, I used to at least think of my home country fondly – even patriotically at times. Not so anymore.

I’m sure you know what this is about. Google UDI and their stupid rules or incompetent case workers and you get the point. This ain’t over.

(insert angry face here)

Trust me – we *will* win this time, and I am currently building up my arsenal. Be prepared, this won’t be pretty.

The sad state of TV these days

You know the song, Johnny Cash’s “Sunday morning coming down”. Should be the theme song of my life…. at least for the weekends. Kidding. It’s not that bad. But it’s on days like those and days when I am just sick and feeling sorry for myself that I spend hours curled up on the couch flipping through channels because I am just too lazy to stretch out and watch a show on my laptop instead. Truth be told, I rarely watch TV. I work at odd hours, mainly evenings and weekends, so when the regular families gather with popcorn and soda to watch Glee, or in Norway – making tacos and watching The Voice and Skavlan, I am usually at work. Or, if I am not, catching up with friends or studying. Don’t get me wrong, there are shows I am addicted to, but I choose the illegal route and download them. There you go, sue me. But once in a blue moon there I am, under a blanket, remote in hand and glaring at the screen. And what appears in front of my weary eyes is probably more pathetic than my condition. OK, so we have The Talk  (the title says it all, a group of women with Julie Chen in charge chatters about everything from their orgasms to their waxing routines or ongoing trials, where they all hope the outcome is “guilty”. Case in point: The Casey Anthony trial). And then we have Dr. Oz! The miracle doctor who will tell uneducated or just oblivious women what the G-spot is and how they can find it. Oh, the sensation! Applause og cheers to that. I mean, if you need a TV-show to educate you about your sex life then perhaps somebody needs to evaluate the whole “abstinence only-ed”. I keep imagining a newly wed couple in bed, clothes off, looking at each other…. ummm… what now? (Sorry, I just can’t help myself). Then there’s The King of Queens – the worst comedy show of all times, MASH reruns, Oprah, some kind of lame wannabe-interactive show where a really annoying person with bad styling tries to recruit brain dead viewers to call in and enter a contest. To be honest, I don’t get the concept, because I can’t get myself to watch more than five seconds. The state of TV has gone downhill.

To sum it up:

THE WORST:

King of Queens

Brothers & Sisters

The Bold and the Beautiful

The Talk

Dr. Oz

The Bachelor

The Real Housewives of whatever trashville they can find

Dr. Phil

Sports! Skiing, soccer, skating….kill me now.

The Drew Carey Show

Judge Judy

SHOWS THAT ARE OK IF I AM TOO SICK TO MOVE

Anything bizarre on TLC, like Little Miss America (what’s wrong with you parents?)

Extreme Couponing (amazes me to the point I have no words left)

SHOWS I KIND OF LIKE

Documentaries

Travel shows

1000 Ways to Die

Anything on Animal Planet that involves baby animals! ❤

CSI late at night, because it helps me fall asleep

Trinny & Susannah – because they are so forward

SHOWS I ABSOLUTELY LOVE, BUT  DOWNLOAD

Mad Men

The Mentalist

Californication

X-files

Revenge (guilty pleasure here)

Gossip Girl

Breaking Bad

Mighty March!

February is the shortest month of the year, but it sure feels like the longest sometimes. Dark days, cold winds, snow and rain… ick. I want spring to come already! I want to see the trees in their new leaves, feel the sunshine on my pale skin, hear the birds chatter outside and go to bed knowing it will not get dark.

We’re one step closer, though, March has arrived! Soon the streets will be bombarded with the noise of Bergen’s drummer boys marching down the narrow alleys – a joy for old patriots, a nuisance for students and vampires.

But until that cheerful time I have to finish some lofty tasks. That’s why Jamie and I took a quick getaway to Sykkylven, to relax and breathe the fresh mountain air and, of course, to celebrate my mom’s birthday. It’s always nice to be home in the big house – it’s quiet, cosy, has a spectacular view, and it has two snuggly cats. 😀

Other than that… things are pretty much the same. We completed our second application for Jamie’s immigrant visa, so cross your fingers folks. UDI has been heavily criticized in media these days – there are so many families our there that are having just as much difficulty as us trying to fulfill all the requirements. The new law was enforced in January 2010, and because of endless waiting times we are finally NOW seeing all the people who are falling between, the messy results of a useless immigration policy. Hey government, you’re targeting the wrong people! OK, I will stop now before I start venting about Krekar and Bhatti and all the other clowns that have no right to be in this country while children are being separated from their families and shipped away to unknown continents. Ah yes, bureaucracy at its finest.

Alas there is nothing I can do but to protest and vent here on my own blog. However, it’s a beautiful day and I choose to put on my happy face and go out to greet the world. Have a fabulous Saturday!

Lessons learned from Facebook

Apparently, Facebook is now an all-knowing platform designed to numb your brain, convince you about what you need to buy, who to hang out with and what information to take in. There is no such thing as “free speech” on FB, at least according to some of its users. If you happen to disagree with someone’s views or issues, don’t you dare to comment on it or engage in discussion. This is defined as BULLYING. I don’t know about you, but when I post links on my page to current events or crazy news – I want to engage my friends, get feedback and hear their opinions. I don’t expect everyone to agree with me, do you? But alas, those who can’t accept that the world is not in unison about everything are not, in my opinion, ready for the daunting tasks of engaging in social media.

But thankfully, there is a simple solution such as “block” or “unfriend”, so that those of us who are adult enough to not take opposing views as being offensive and insulting can carry on.

However, on a sidenote, I should add that the biggest lessons I’ve learned so far are those from my own mistakes. Note to self: NEVER go on Facebook after a night of booze. It’s like faceraping yourself. My apologies to anyone who’s ever gotten a crazy rant consisting of weird punctuation and semantically confusing doo dah. I am sincerely sorry.

image via ibtimes.com

Benetton pulls ad campaign over protests

Apparently, this ad showing several world leaders kissing is a bit too much for moral conservatives. I don’t get it. Promoting wars and killing is a-ok, but put some smooches in there and you raise hell. Personally, I am not offended by this. Are you?